Saturday February 17, 2018; 8:02 AM EST
Check out this piece in Quartz, which is ostensibly about encouraging men to mentor women, even though we might be afraid to be alone with women. Like many stories about #metoo, it's condescending, threatening, disrespectful even humiliating to men. #- This is one reason men are scared to be alone with women. I feel it, when I'm alone in an elevator with a woman I don't know. I move as far away as I can, and shrink my body to be as small as possible. I'm wary of making smalltalk with women I don't know. I have no idea how they'll interpret it. Or when I called the front desk of the hotel to ask for help with the TV and a woman shows up. You're trusting this person with your reputation, every time. Yes I know, you want me to experience it. You got it, I'm experiencing it. But the taunting? Taking about me masturbating and locking women in my office? That is exactly the problem. We're afraid you're giving every wrong deed done by all men to each of us, no matter how we, as individuals, actually relate to women. That's why it feels safer to follow Mike Pence's rule. #
- Humiliating us isn't going to make us more comfortable, and as long as we have a choice, many will choose to stay safe. I get how this is unfair to women, so let's work together to lower the tension and to make a safe environment for everyone. A win-win doesn't begin by deliberately disadvantaging one group of people. #
- So here's some free mentoring. The Golden Rule is a good place to start. You catch more flies with honey, is another good one. And a new one that might not have occurred to you -- men are people too, and we're not all that different from you. Treat us like people you care about and you might be surprised at the result. #